The Letter
by rowan1
Summary: Pure Zechs and Noin fluffiness. I got a toothache just writing it. Quite the sappy one. (Sorry the html. screwed up a bit when I loaded it.) Fresh from the oven Part 2!!!
1. Default Chapter Title

Note: Don't own em'. Wish I did, but sadly I do not. Don't sue because you'll get nothing! I have no money…Oh the life of a student! Alas and alack!

The Letter

By Rowan

June 11th AC 196

Lucerzia Noin sighed wearily as she opened the door to her office. These past

months setting up the Preventer agency had been some of the busiest of her life, not counting her days at the academy. A smile threatened to cross her lips as memories of her academy days sprang to mind. However, she quickly pushed them away. "No time to think about the past, when there's a mountain of paper work on my desk." She said to herself as she strode over to her large oak desk.

It was early evening. The light that seeped in between the narrow blinds of her

window had an orange tint to it. Most of her colleagues had already gone home for the evening, however, Noin being the tremendous workaholic that she was, usually didn't leave the office until well after midnight on most nights. To those that didn't know her Noin's dedication was admirable, however her friends knew the truth. Noin had thrown herself into work to compensate for the loss of Zechs Merquise, her former comrade and the man Noin had been in love with ever since she was a cadet at Lake Victoria. 

Noin settled down behind the desk. She shook her head as she gazed at the pile

before her. It was going to be a long night. 

By 9:30 the pile had shrunk to a few memos and a tattered envelope. "I wonder

when that got here." Noin thought aloud as she picked the envelope up. It had clearly seen better days. The once white envelope was slightly yellowed and what appeared to be mobile suit grease stained one corner. There was no return address on it, just her name,

which was scrawled eloquently across the envelope, in a familiar hand that she couldn't quite seem to place. 

Noin shrugged and picked up a letter opener. She carefully opened the envelope

and removed it's contents, a letter. Noin let out a startled gasp when she realized who it was from. "Zechs…" She whispered as she began to read.

Dec.20th AC 195

My Dearest Lucerzia,

I write these lines during a lull in the chaos that has become my life. If you are

reading this letter then something has gone wrong. I had meant to tell you these things in person. To confess my feelings face to face, but I suppose these lines will have to be my voice. 

I almost destroyed you today. My beam saber was poised to strike, Epyon

screamed for me to destroy any and all who stood in my way, yet I could not bring myself to do it. I could not allow you to be harmed, so I retreated. I truly am a weak man when it comes to you. Though I suppose one would not think it so if they saw the way I've treated you these past years. 

I know I've been cold. I know I've treated you as nothing more than a friend, and

not a very dear one at that. I simply could not risk anyone harming you because they knew how much you meant to me. I would not have been able to live with myself if any one had hurt you because of me. 

I love you that much, though I know that one such as myself does not deserve to

love someone like you. I do not even deserve to be your friend; my soul is so tainted. Long ago a poet once said that in war "Men wash their hands in blood as best they can." that's what I've tried to do. My hands are steeped in the blood of my men, in the blood of the innocent. I am trying to do what is best for the world. I am trying to use my blood stained hands to restore peace, for my father's memory, for Relena, and for you.

If things have gone as I hoped they would, then my duty to my kingdom and my

father's memory has been served. Now my only duty is to you. To repay you for all that you have done, for all that you have suffered because of your love for me. I will repay you, and though I don't deserve it, I will work to become a man worthy of your love.

I will find my way back to you my dear Lucezia. I will work until there is no

longer breath left within my body in order to make things right between us, in order to give you the love that you deserve. I promise that we will see one another again. Nothing will stop me. I will become the wind itself if that is what it takes to return to you.

Until we are together again remember that I have and always will love you. You

are the light that shall guide my bloodied soul from the darkness. You are everything. 

-Zechs

Dec. 29th AC 196

Noin finished reading the crumpled letter and placed it back in the pocket of her Preventer uniform. She always kept it close to her and she often read it whenever she felt troubled. Reading his words was like having Zechs there with her in a way. Drawing on his strength whenever she was worried, and the present situation definitely had her worried.

The Barton foundation had managed to land countless mobile suits on earth. It seemed as if war was unavoidable now, and the Gundams were still on a collision course with the sun. No one knew if Quatre would be able to reach them in time. Noin looked out into space. She had always seen space as a place for bright futures, yet now the outlook was bleak indeed.

"Fire, Hey Fire. Are you in there? Fire? Aww…screw protocol. Noin snap out of it."

Noin tore her gaze from the window to meet her partner Water's, or rather Sally's impatient eyes.

"Gods, Noin I've been calling you for five minutes. We've got a call coming in from headquarters."

"Sorry, I guess I got caught up in my thoughts for a moment there." Noin said brushing a few errant strands of black hair from her face and rising. She followed Sally into the cockpit of their shuttle, and settled into a chair in front of the monitor. A few moments later Lady Une's face appeared on the screen. 

"Water and Fire our situation is critical. I have new orders for each of you, and time is of the essence. Water you are to head to the following coordinates and assist the Preventer teams in the L3 area."

Sally smiled and leaned over towards Noin. "You think Duo left some treats for me?" Noin shook her head. Sally was one of a slim few people who could joke at a time like this. It was one of the things Noin had come to admire about her partner.

"Fire, you are to take your mobile suit and proceed to Earth. You will rendezvous with your new partner at these coordinates."

Noin was shocked. Why would she be reassigned at this point in the game? Certainly there were other agents closer to Earth that could operate a mobile suit. Sally may need her help at L3.

"May I ask why I was selected for this mission?"

Noin could almost swear that she saw a hint of a smile play on Lady Une's lips.

"You were requested by the Preventer agent in charge of the mission Fire. Your new partner in fact." Noin started to say something in protest but Lady Une stopped her. "Don't try to argue. You must start for Earth right away in order to reach the rendezvous point in time."

Noin was still confused as to why she was chosen for the mission but she realized that time was slipping away. "Yes mam." She said rising.

"I'll leave immediately." She turned to walk towards the ship's cargo hold where her personal ship was docked.

"One more thing Noin." Lady Une's use of her name caused Noin to turn around. "Your partner's code name is Preventer Wind. He'll be expecting you at o-nine-hundred."

Noin's heart stopped for a moment. Could it be? She nodded to the screen and exited the cockpit.

__

"I will become the wind itself if that is what it takes to return to you."

As she piloted her small shuttle towards Earth Lucrezia Noin could not help but smile. 

Note: Well first off, sorry if I got a few details screwed up… I've only seen the edited version of Endless Waltz, and that was only once (damn cheap housing dept. won't pay for expanded cable programming package), so that's what I had to work with.

The lines from the poem in Zechs' letter are from the work "Eighth Air Force" by Randall Jarrell, who by the way is an awesome poet. If you haven't already, you should read some of his work, its pure genius.

I know its romantic drivel but I was in the mood to write it. Don't worry I will go back to my academy series eventually… I just had to get this one out of my system. Don't forget to let me know what you think. Thanks as always for your time. 


	2. A Memento

Author's Note: Okay, I finally bought Endless Waltz on DVD, and let me tell ya, if you've only seen it on Cartoon Network, then you haven't seen it. They so cheated us out of some prime Zechs and Noin moments! Needless to say, I became inspired and this addition to "The Letter" was the result. I do believe that I may even add a part three if this new part goes over well with everyone. So I hope you like

Oh one more thing this part is in first person. I felt like it would flow better that way. And I realize that the time line is a little off but, I wanted to try and have some sense of continuity between these two chapters so I had to stick with the dates I had created before I saw Endless Waltz again, sorry. That being said…on with the show.

A Memento

Dec. 29th AC 196

My hands tightened on Tallgeese's controls. With Barton's threat to drop X-18999 on to Earth, all I could do was watch helplessly as the attack force glided towards the defenseless blue orb below. My jaw tightened at the sight of a green Gundam escorting the mushroom like transports. _Wufei…_

I had no love for the pilot. In fact a part of me wanted to go and challenge him that instant, damn the consequences. I owed him a severe beating in the very least. He had after all tried to kill Noin at Victoria, before he realized that she was a woman. _Noin…_ I shook my head. I can't think of her now.

A bitter laugh escaped my throat. _Not think of her_, I bowed my head. _Try to stop breathing…it would be a simpler task._ The fact of the matter was that there hadn't been a day since that blessed first day at Victoria that I had not thought of her. She was my light. The only person who could see past all the blood and guilt, and see the man within me. My Lucrezia, who stood at my side even when I doubted myself, she was the reason for my souls redemption. 

A familiar voice over the com tore me from my thoughts. "This is Duo, the colony's stability control is stabilized you can blow that baby." 

I began to charge Tallgeese's mega cannon. A satisfied smile threatening to break out across my face, when another voice took my breath away for an instant.

"You guys stopped Operation Meteor?" It was her. Gods, to hear that voice again. The voice that had haunted my dreams this past year. I almost forgot what I was doing.

"This is Wind," I said once I regained control of my senses. My face becomes a mask of pure determination. _Now's not the time._ "I'm destroying MO3." I fired the mega cannon. The explosion was blinding. In a matter of seconds MO3 was nothing more than a mass of rubble floating in space. 

Unfortunately, Barton's shuttle managed to escape the resource satellite before I fired. "You were a little late." A smug voice called out to me. "See you again." 

I watched the shuttle silently glide away. _Damn you Barton. I will stop you. I did not return from the dead to fail… _

***

After I had brought Tallgeese into a secure orbit I settled down to wait for my new partner. I laughed at the thought. Actually, I was waiting on my old partner. When I requested this mission I also had asked Lady Une to assign Noin to work with me. I could not possibly imagine any one more suited for this mission save one of the Gundam pilots themselves. Since they were occupied with other matters, Preventer Fire was the obvious choice to watch my back in the coming battle.

Preventer Fire, the name suited her. She had certainly caused my soul to burn. _Noin…What will it be like to see you again?_ I wondered if things would be any different after our year apart. Was she still capable of loving one such as myself? A man whose soul had bathed in so much blood during the war that he had to die for a year in order to cleanse it, could she possibly love me? Or forgive me for that matter?

I sighed and pulled a small green notebook from the folds of my space suit. I held it in my hands for a moment not opening it, allowing my gloved fingers to dance across the delicate script adorning its cover, as they had so many times over the years. It was a journal, a memento of years long past, the words within written by the one who owned my tortured soul. 

Of course she never even realized that I took it. It wouldn't do for her to be aware of my true feelings for her. If anyone ever knew exactly how much I loved her, they might have tried to harm her in order to get to me. I had to protect her, even if that meant denying myself the privilege of telling her how I felt.

Naturally, there had been times when selfishly I had considered telling her. Usually, I held myself in check and remained silent. Once though, I actually put pen to paper and told her my feelings in a letter. It was just after a battle with the Gundam pilots, she had put herself in between Epyon and Peacemillion. I had almost killed her that day. I shudder even now at the thought of how close I came to sending her into oblivion. In a moment of weakness I wrote that letter, and gave instructions to one of my men to send it to her if anything were to happen to me. 

I doubt she received it. Not many people escaped that day with their lives. I'm sure that man was counted among the day's casualties. It was probably for the best anyway. She's sure to reject any overtures of love after the way I've treated her these past few years. Besides what would a pure spirit like her want with a blood stained soul like mine?

I open the notebook and my soul warms at the sight of her elegant script. I stare at the pages without reading them. I have them practically memorized at this point. I keep the notebook as a sort of token. A physical manifestation of her essence if you will. It's something tangible that I can hold on to when my longing for her grows too great to simply push away. The pages have yellowed slightly over the years and the ink has faded, but the small book is a treasure to me. 

I sigh and allow myself to picture her face. The endless depths of her eyes. Her proud features. The way she moved. All the times we'd stay up till dawn working together and watched the sunrise. It's slow torture but I relish every memory. They're all I've allowed myself over the years after all.

***

Tallgeese's alarms sound. A shuttle is approaching. I know it's her without looking away from the notebook. I can sense it. Her face appears on my forward screen. I can't bring myself to look at her just yet. Keeping my focus on the page before me I speak.

"Is that you Noin?"

"I've come to pick you up Zechs." She replies.

__

Oh, how I love you. "Thanks," I lower the notebook. She looks so beautiful. "So Noin how have you been doing?" _Do you still love me?_

She bows her head. "Good…" After a moment she looks at me again, "Zechs it's been one year and two days."

In that moment I know that I will never leave her again, and when this is all over I will finally tell her how I feel. She maneuvers the shuttle to pick up Tallgeese. I let a silent prayer slip to whatever force that controls our destinies to allow us to survive and then prepare to dock…

Well, that's it for now. As I said earlier I have an idea for more, it all just depends on the response I get on this one…actually that's not entirely true. I'll probably write more even if everyone tells me this part sucks. I'm on a roll here. I just can't control my Zechs and Noin addiction! I have to write more… more… more I tell you… 

As always thanks for your time.


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